FAMILY & CHILDREN'S COUNSELING SERVICES, INC.
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      • Bryony Hottendorf - Human Resources Assistant
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      • Leslie Martinez Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Kasandra Estrada
      • Erica Washington, MSW, ACSW Associate Clinical Social Worker 95523
      • Tiffany Runge, AMFT 112914
      • Emily Medina, MS, LMFT 134196
      • Tyree Griffith MS APCC 7863
      • Lizvet Garcia Therapist Trainee
      • Julianna Hopkins Therapist Trainee
      • Lizbeth Brito Therapist Trainee >
        • Lizbeth Brito aprendiz de terapeuta
      • Katie Servin Therapist Trainee >
        • Katie Servin ASL Therapist Trainee
      • Amber McGuire Therapist Trainee
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      • Post-Adoption
      • Family Maintenance
      • EPIC Family
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Online Therapy >
        • Online Therapy- Questions and Answers
      • Cognitive-Behavioral (CBT)
      • Play Therapy
      • Play Therapy for Adults
      • Multi-Sensory Integration
      • Parent-Child Therpay
      • Experiential Therapy
      • REBT
      • EMDR
      • School Based Family Counseling >
        • For Schools and Districts- PBIS Partners
      • E-Motion >
        • Movement- Stored Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness
    • Supervised Visitation >
      • Online Visits
      • Getting Started
      • Facilitated Visitation
      • Monitored Exchange
    • Family Preservation
    • Groups >
      • Confident Kids
      • Productive Parenting
    • Daycare / School- Based Services
    • Associate Clinical Supervision
    • Workshops
    • Online Learning Center >
      • Become a Supervised Visitation Monitor
    • PBIS Partners >
      • Why Do We Have Empty Chairs?
      • Signs A Student May Benefit
      • Why Should My School Collaborate with FCCS?
      • School-Based Services May Include
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    • Insurance Accepted >
      • Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal
      • TriCare
      • Health Net
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      • aetna
      • Molina
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      • Kaiser
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      • Important Note About Insurance
    • Superbills
    • Reduced Fee Therapy
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    • Recommended Reading
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    • Now Hiring Therapist Associate >
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    • Now Hiring Community Based Therapist
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    • Now Hiring Assistant Program Manager Supervised Visitation
Back to Guide

Adopt a Lifelong LifeStyle Mentality

This week's topic is all in our heads- literally.  Never underestimate the power of the mind.  Our mental attitude will determine our success or failure before we even begin working on our goals- weight loss or otherwise. This week will be an exercise in mindfulness.


Right now, you may be all psyched up and ready to give it your all.  You are willing to trade your Big Mac and Bon-Bons for tofu salad and soybean cakes.  You’re ready to start running five miles every day.  You will be in a size 2 in a couple of months. This time, you won’t give up!

Well, you gotta love enthusiasm.  Unfortunately, if losing weight were only a matter of really, really wanting to, everybody would be thin.  Losing weight and getting fit takes time and it takes effort.  Mostly, it takes commitment.

Or, perhaps you are exactly the opposite.  Maybe you’ve tried losing weight and getting in shape a zillion times, and you’re just sick and tired of the fluctuations and failures.  Part of gaining that lifelong mentality is to take those “failures” and learn from them.  What worked, even a little or for a short time?  What didn’t work at all?  What did you like?  What did you hate?  Use that information to help you now.

Don’t think of it as failure, think of it as practice!

Overeating, inactivity and the desire to quit are, at least in part, learned behaviors.  That is very good news because it means that these behaviors can be unlearned.  While we unlearn our old, unhealthy behaviors, we will learn new healthy, productive behaviors, one at a time.  We will take it slow, making small changes that will become new, healthy habits.  Slow and lasting changes are better than passionate but temporary ones.  Be patient with yourself as you acquire new information and establish a new way of thinking.  While most of us would rather have a quick fix, our brains simply do not work that way. Mental reprogramming takes time and practice.

Also keep in mind that achieving health and fitness is a journey; not a destination.  While you may have an ultimate weight loss goal in mind, reaching that goal will not signal the end of the journey. Maintaining that loss and preserving your desired level of fitness will require your attention, as well.  This means that your goals will need your total commitment: your physical, mental and emotional commitment. 

If you wanted to get a promotion at work, you wouldn’t give your best for one week and then become a slacker, thinking you could skate by on that one week’s worth of great performance.  You would give it your all; you would go above and beyond.  You would keep it up until you got that promotion.  And, you would keep it up after you received that promotion so you wouldn’t end up with a demotion or notice of termination.  The same concept applies to weight loss and fitness.  It requires your staying power.

Take it steady and enjoy the process.  Revel in each little accomplishment.  Acknowledge that these little successes will eventually add up to big results.  Remember that what you do today will affect your life tomorrow.  Where do you want to be in a year or 5, 10, or 20 years from now?  At the same weight, or perhaps even more?  Out of shape and unhealthy?  Or fit, trim and strong?  How about looking and feeling your very best?  The years will come and go whether you are making progress or not. 

Choose to make progress.

Admit that you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.  Realize that you can make better choices and healthier decisions.  Believe that you deserve better.  Reach for more and never settle for less.  Resolve to be the best you can be.  Instead of thinking of this book as a quick fix or a means to an ends, think of it as the blueprint for your new foundation- your firm foundation toward building a better you.  Adopt a Lifelong Lifestyle Mentality.  The healthy habits you learn now will carry you into the rest of your happier, healthier life.

Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts.  Proverbs 4:23

Back to LifeStyle Guide

This information should not serve as a replacement for therapy.  Please visit the Can Therapy Help Me page for more information if you think you may have an eating disorder, or should require individualized help.
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HELPING FAMILIES HEAL, PLAY AND LOVE!


Hours

M-F: 9am - 6pm 
After hours and weekends by appointment 

Telephone

800-430-4490
or go to Meet Us for individual direct contact

Email

info@healplaylove.org
or go to Contact for
department contact
Various legal disclaimers: The persons depicted on this site are models.  Photos do not represent or guarantee results.  Contact for service areas.  This site uses cookies. Your use of this site implies your agreement to the use of cookies. See Privacy Policy for more information.  California residents see the California Consumer Privacy Act.

FCCS is directed by Melinda Haynes, MA, California LMFT 102308.  Oklahoma LMFT 1153. North Carolina LMFT 2143.

We provide therapy for various trauma issues including absent parent, parent in prison, violence, witnessing violence, domestic violence, tragedy, murder,, witness to murder, grief, loss,, death, friend killed, violence in neighborhood, fear, first responder, vicarious trauma, nightmares, panic.

​The National Supervised Visitation online training program is a subsidiary of FCCS and can be found at 
https://www.SupervisedVisitationTraining.com.  Professional consulting for mental and behavioral health professionals is available at www.MelindaHaynes.com.  



Providing Therapy Services in: Los Angeles | San Diego | San Francisco | San Jose | Fresno | Long Beach | Sacramento | Oakland | Santa Ana | Anaheim | Riverside | Stockton | Manteca | Chula Vista | Fremont | Irvine | San Bernadino | Modesto | Oxnard | Fontana | Moreno Valley | Glendale | Huntington Beach | Santa Clarita |  Garden Grove | Santa Rosa | Oceanside | Rancho Cucamonga | Ontario | Lancaster | Elk Grove | Palmdale | Corona | Salinas | Pomona | Torrance | Hayward | Escondido | Pasadena |  Orange | Fullerton | Thousand Oaks | Visalia | Simi Valley | Concord | Roseville | Santa Clara | Vallejo | Victorville | El Monte | Berkeley | Downey | Costa Mesa | Inglewood | Ventura | West Covina | Norwalk | Carlsbad | Fairfield | Richmond | Murrieta | Burbank | Antioch | Daly City | Temecula | Santa Maria | El Cajon | Rialto | Clovis | San Mateo | Compton | South Gate | Vista | Mission Viejo | Vacaville | Carson | Hesperia | Redding | Santa Monica | Westminster | Santa Barbara | Chico | Whittier | Newport Beach | San Leandro | Hawthorne | San Marcos | Citrus Heights | Alhambra | Tracy | Livermore | Buena Park | Lakewood | Merced | Hemet | Chino | Menifee | Napa

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Find the best  Medi-Cal medicaid therapist by going to your county link. These links will take you off the Family & Children's Counseling Services, Inc. website. 


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  • Home
    • Crisis Information
    • Good Faith Estimate
    • How You Can Help >
      • Volunteer Opportunities
      • Social Media Support
      • Donate >
        • Sponsor a Child, Parent or Family
        • Donate to Our Equipment and Supplies Fund
        • Donate to the General Fund
    • Privacy Policy
    • California Consumer Privacy Act (CCPA)
    • Consumer Privacy HIPAA
  • About
    • Areas Served
    • Contact >
      • Referral Request
      • Satisfaction Survey
    • Brochures
    • Folletos en espanol
    • Who We Are >
      • What is a Trainee, Associate
    • What We Do
    • Meet Our Team >
      • Bryony Hottendorf - Human Resources Assistant
      • Roxanna Taylor- Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Roxanna Taylor- General Assistant Therapy Program
      • Leslie Martinez Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Kasandra Estrada
      • Erica Washington, MSW, ACSW Associate Clinical Social Worker 95523
      • Tiffany Runge, AMFT 112914
      • Emily Medina, MS, LMFT 134196
      • Tyree Griffith MS APCC 7863
      • Lizvet Garcia Therapist Trainee
      • Julianna Hopkins Therapist Trainee
      • Lizbeth Brito Therapist Trainee >
        • Lizbeth Brito aprendiz de terapeuta
      • Katie Servin Therapist Trainee >
        • Katie Servin ASL Therapist Trainee
      • Amber McGuire Therapist Trainee
      • Melinda Haynes, MA, LMFT. Executive Director
    • Our History
    • As Seen On
    • Trauma-Informed
    • Mission Vision Philosophy
    • Values
  • Services
    • Coaching >
      • Reunification Coaching
      • Co-Parenting | Parallel Parenting Coaching
      • Parent Skills Coaching
      • Kids Behavior Coaching
    • Therapy or Counseling >
      • Family Therapy
      • Child Therapy
      • Teen Therapy
      • Reunification Therapy
      • Co-Parenting Therapy
      • LGBTQAI+ Counseling
      • Christian Counseling
      • Foster /Kinship
      • Post-Adoption
      • Family Maintenance
      • EPIC Family
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Online Therapy >
        • Online Therapy- Questions and Answers
      • Cognitive-Behavioral (CBT)
      • Play Therapy
      • Play Therapy for Adults
      • Multi-Sensory Integration
      • Parent-Child Therpay
      • Experiential Therapy
      • REBT
      • EMDR
      • School Based Family Counseling >
        • For Schools and Districts- PBIS Partners
      • E-Motion >
        • Movement- Stored Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness
    • Supervised Visitation >
      • Online Visits
      • Getting Started
      • Facilitated Visitation
      • Monitored Exchange
    • Family Preservation
    • Groups >
      • Confident Kids
      • Productive Parenting
    • Daycare / School- Based Services
    • Associate Clinical Supervision
    • Workshops
    • Online Learning Center >
      • Become a Supervised Visitation Monitor
    • PBIS Partners >
      • Why Do We Have Empty Chairs?
      • Signs A Student May Benefit
      • Why Should My School Collaborate with FCCS?
      • School-Based Services May Include
  • Insurance / Fees
    • Insurance Accepted >
      • Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal
      • TriCare
      • Health Net
      • California Health and Wellness
      • Cigna
      • aetna
      • Molina
      • Molina Medi-Cal
      • Kaiser
      • Victim-Witness
      • Cash Pay
      • Important Note About Insurance
    • Superbills
    • Reduced Fee Therapy
  • Helpful Links
    • Legal Resources in California
    • Community Services >
      • Community Services- Butte County California
      • Community Services- Sacramento County California
      • Community Services- San Diego County California
      • Community Services- Orange County California
    • Can Therapy Help Me?
    • Can Therapy Help My Child?
    • Helping Kids Feel Safe in a Scary World
    • Attachment Trauma Recovery >
      • Origins of Attachment Trauma
      • Signs of Attachment Trauma in Adults and Children
      • Therapy for Attachment Trauma
    • Mental Health Apps
    • Help! My Kids Have Been Taken by CPS >
      • California CSD
    • Places to Go- Family Fun >
      • Places to Go in Texas
      • Places to Go in California >
        • Places to Go in Butte County California
        • Places to Go in Shasta County California
        • Places to Go Suisun City, California
        • Places to Go in Fairfield, California
      • Places to Go in North Carolina
      • Places to Go in Oklahoma >
        • Places to Go in Tulsa, Oklahoma
        • Places to Go in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
    • Recommended Reading
    • Celebrity Psychology
    • Weight Management >
      • Why We Develop Bad Habits
      • Diets Don't Work
      • Mapping Out Success
      • Journaling
      • Making New Habits
      • Creating Staying Power
    • Can We Talk?
    • Life On Their Terms >
      • Is My Partner Abusive?
      • The Cycle of Violence
      • Dangers of Staying
      • Healing From an Abusive Relationship
    • What is a Treatment Plan?
    • Of Caterpillars and Courage
    • LifeStyle Wellbeing- Creating a New You
  • Career Center
    • What We Offer
    • Practicum Site - Healthcare Administrator
    • Practicum Site - Therapist Trainee
    • Now Hiring Therapist Associate >
      • Therapist Associate Application
    • Now Hiring Community Based Therapist
    • Now Hiring Family Support Specialist
    • Now Hiring Assistant Program Manager Supervised Visitation