FAMILY & CHILDREN'S COUNSELING SERVICES, INC.
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      • Bryony Hottendorf - Human Resources Assistant
      • Roxanna Taylor- Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Roxanna Taylor- General Assistant Therapy Program
      • Leslie Martinez Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Kasandra Estrada
      • Erica Washington, MSW, ACSW Associate Clinical Social Worker 95523
      • Tiffany Runge, AMFT 112914
      • Emily Medina, MS, LMFT 134196
      • Tyree Griffith MS APCC 7863
      • Lizvet Garcia Therapist Trainee
      • Julianna Hopkins Therapist Trainee
      • Lizbeth Brito Therapist Trainee >
        • Lizbeth Brito aprendiz de terapeuta
      • Katie Servin Therapist Trainee >
        • Katie Servin ASL Therapist Trainee
      • Amber McGuire Therapist Trainee
      • Melinda Haynes, MA, LMFT. Executive Director
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    • Coaching >
      • Reunification Coaching
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      • Parent Skills Coaching
      • Kids Behavior Coaching
    • Therapy or Counseling >
      • Family Therapy
      • Child Therapy
      • Teen Therapy
      • Reunification Therapy
      • Co-Parenting Therapy
      • LGBTQAI+ Counseling
      • Christian Counseling
      • Foster /Kinship
      • Post-Adoption
      • Family Maintenance
      • EPIC Family
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Online Therapy >
        • Online Therapy- Questions and Answers
      • Cognitive-Behavioral (CBT)
      • Play Therapy
      • Play Therapy for Adults
      • Multi-Sensory Integration
      • Parent-Child Therpay
      • Experiential Therapy
      • REBT
      • EMDR
      • School Based Family Counseling >
        • For Schools and Districts- PBIS Partners
      • E-Motion >
        • Movement- Stored Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness
    • Supervised Visitation >
      • Online Visits
      • Getting Started
      • Facilitated Visitation
      • Monitored Exchange
    • Family Preservation
    • Groups >
      • Confident Kids
      • Productive Parenting
    • Daycare / School- Based Services
    • Associate Clinical Supervision
    • Workshops
    • Online Learning Center >
      • Become a Supervised Visitation Monitor
    • PBIS Partners >
      • Why Do We Have Empty Chairs?
      • Signs A Student May Benefit
      • Why Should My School Collaborate with FCCS?
      • School-Based Services May Include
  • Insurance / Fees
    • Insurance Accepted >
      • Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal
      • TriCare
      • Health Net
      • California Health and Wellness
      • Cigna
      • aetna
      • Molina
      • Molina Medi-Cal
      • Kaiser
      • Victim-Witness
      • Cash Pay
      • Important Note About Insurance
    • Superbills
    • Reduced Fee Therapy
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    • Can Therapy Help Me?
    • Can Therapy Help My Child?
    • Helping Kids Feel Safe in a Scary World
    • Attachment Trauma Recovery >
      • Origins of Attachment Trauma
      • Signs of Attachment Trauma in Adults and Children
      • Therapy for Attachment Trauma
    • Mental Health Apps
    • Help! My Kids Have Been Taken by CPS >
      • California CSD
    • Places to Go- Family Fun >
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        • Places to Go in Butte County California
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        • Places to Go Suisun City, California
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        • Places to Go in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
    • Recommended Reading
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      • Why We Develop Bad Habits
      • Diets Don't Work
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    • Can We Talk?
    • Life On Their Terms >
      • Is My Partner Abusive?
      • The Cycle of Violence
      • Dangers of Staying
      • Healing From an Abusive Relationship
    • What is a Treatment Plan?
    • Of Caterpillars and Courage
    • LifeStyle Wellbeing- Creating a New You
  • Career Center
    • What We Offer
    • Practicum Site - Healthcare Administrator
    • Practicum Site - Therapist Trainee
    • Now Hiring Therapist Associate >
      • Therapist Associate Application
    • Now Hiring Community Based Therapist
    • Now Hiring Family Support Specialist
    • Now Hiring Assistant Program Manager Supervised Visitation

WARNING: Some abusers check browser history.  Clear yours for safety.

What is Domestic Violence?
​

​Domestic Violence, also known as Domestic Abuse, Intimate Partner Violence, Relationship Violence and Spousal Abuse affects more than 1 out of every 3 women and 1 out of every  4 men.  (The American Psychological Association)
 
Domestic abuse is a cycle of violence that increases in severity and frequency over time.  The abuse can be physical, emotional, economic, sexual or social. 
 
The Power and Control Wheel demonstrates the tactics used by abusive men in their attempts to gain control over their wives or girlfriends.   These tactics are in stark contrast to the characteristics found in a healthy relationship, as shown on the Equality Wheel (off-site link to a blog containing the image).

​The Abusers

Abusers tend to have issues with jealousy, insecurity and depression, which results in their quest for power and control within their intimate relationships.  Chemical dependency on the part of the abuser plays a role in 50-70% of domestic violence cases.
 
Some common traits among abusers are:

- Refusal to accept responsibility for his behavior and/or blaming others (“If you didn’t make me so angry, I wouldn’t have said/done that.”)
- Denial of abuse, addiction or other problems.  (“I don’t need counseling.  Counseling is for wackos.”  “I’m not abusive.  We just fight sometimes.  All couples do that.”)
​- History of violence in family of origin.  

Is my partner abusive? (questions to ask yourself)

The Victims
​

The Abused tend to have problems with low self-esteem, depression and anxiety.  Most often, these feelings are the result of being in the abusive relationship, rather than the cause of it.
 
The effects of domestic violence include lowered self-esteem, guilt, anxiety, depression, feelings of hopelessness and shame.  In some cases, women will suffer from PTSD.  Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is characterized by flashbacks, nightmares, sleep disturbances, bouts of uncontrollable crying, holes in memory, apathy, emotional numbness, hyper-vigilance, feeling edgy and an inability to concentrate.
 
It is a good idea for the victim to get counseling as soon as possible, especially those suffering from PTSD.  Check in your area for a counselor or therapist who has experience counseling domestic violence survivors.  Many women’s shelters offer free individual and group counseling.
 
Victim Witness provides counseling-related financial assistance and legal advocacy to victims of domestic violence.  Call your local police department or women’s shelter.

Life On Their Terms
Is My Partner Abusive?
​The Cycle of Violence
Dangers of Staying
Healing From an Abusive Relationship

​Online Support, Information and Resources
 
The 12 Step Cyber Café offers excellent online help in recovering from unhealthy relationships.
http://www.12steps.com/
 
National Domestic Violence Hotline site offers a wealth of information on domestic violence and getting help.
http://www.ndvh.org/

Sources:

The Domestic Violence Information and Referral Handbook, from the Domestic Violence Project of Santa Clara County, CA.
http://www.growing.com/nonviolent/index.htm
 
The Domestic Abuse Intervention Project of Duluth
https://www.theduluthmodel.org/  
The American Psychological Association
http://www.apa.org/releases/facts.html


See also...
Life On Their Terms
Is My Partner Abusive?
​The Cycle of Violence
Dangers of Staying
Healing From an Abusive Relationship
​

HELPING FAMILIES HEAL, PLAY AND LOVE!


Hours

M-F: 9am - 6pm 
After hours and weekends by appointment 

Telephone

800-430-4490
or go to Meet Us for individual direct contact

Email

info@healplaylove.org
or go to Contact for
department contact
Various legal disclaimers: The persons depicted on this site are models.  Photos do not represent or guarantee results.  Contact for service areas.  This site uses cookies. Your use of this site implies your agreement to the use of cookies. See Privacy Policy for more information.  California residents see the California Consumer Privacy Act.

FCCS is directed by Melinda Haynes, MA, California LMFT 102308.  Oklahoma LMFT 1153. North Carolina LMFT 2143.

We provide therapy for various trauma issues including absent parent, parent in prison, violence, witnessing violence, domestic violence, tragedy, murder,, witness to murder, grief, loss,, death, friend killed, violence in neighborhood, fear, first responder, vicarious trauma, nightmares, panic.

​The National Supervised Visitation online training program is a subsidiary of FCCS and can be found at 
https://www.SupervisedVisitationTraining.com.  Professional consulting for mental and behavioral health professionals is available at www.MelindaHaynes.com.  



Providing Therapy Services in: Los Angeles | San Diego | San Francisco | San Jose | Fresno | Long Beach | Sacramento | Oakland | Santa Ana | Anaheim | Riverside | Stockton | Manteca | Chula Vista | Fremont | Irvine | San Bernadino | Modesto | Oxnard | Fontana | Moreno Valley | Glendale | Huntington Beach | Santa Clarita |  Garden Grove | Santa Rosa | Oceanside | Rancho Cucamonga | Ontario | Lancaster | Elk Grove | Palmdale | Corona | Salinas | Pomona | Torrance | Hayward | Escondido | Pasadena |  Orange | Fullerton | Thousand Oaks | Visalia | Simi Valley | Concord | Roseville | Santa Clara | Vallejo | Victorville | El Monte | Berkeley | Downey | Costa Mesa | Inglewood | Ventura | West Covina | Norwalk | Carlsbad | Fairfield | Richmond | Murrieta | Burbank | Antioch | Daly City | Temecula | Santa Maria | El Cajon | Rialto | Clovis | San Mateo | Compton | South Gate | Vista | Mission Viejo | Vacaville | Carson | Hesperia | Redding | Santa Monica | Westminster | Santa Barbara | Chico | Whittier | Newport Beach | San Leandro | Hawthorne | San Marcos | Citrus Heights | Alhambra | Tracy | Livermore | Buena Park | Lakewood | Merced | Hemet | Chino | Menifee | Napa

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Try finding a therapist near me -  See our areas served. 

Find the best  Medi-Cal medicaid therapist by going to your county link. These links will take you off the Family & Children's Counseling Services, Inc. website. 


Alameda | Alpine | Amador | Butte | Calaveras | Colusa |  ContraCosta | DelNorte | ElDorado |  Fresno | Glenn | Humboldt | Imperial | Inyo | Kern | Kings | Lake | Lassen | LosAngeles |  Madera | Marin | Mariposa | Mendocino | Merced | Modoc | Mono | Monterey | Napa | Nevada | Orange | Placer | Plumas | Riverside | Sa​cra​mento| San Benito | San Bernardino | San Diego | San Francisco | San Joaquin | San Luis Obispo | San Mateo | Santa Barbara | Santa Clara |  SantaCruz | Shasta | Sierra | Siskiyou | Solano | Sonoma | Stanislaus | Sutter | Tehama | Trinity | Tulare | Tuolumne | Ventura | Yolo | Yuba    
"Best child therapy" read here.   
"Best child therapist near me" read here 
"Best therapist near me" read here.
How do I find the best child therapist for my child read here.

  • Home
    • Crisis Information
    • Good Faith Estimate
    • How You Can Help >
      • Volunteer Opportunities
      • Social Media Support
      • Donate >
        • Sponsor a Child, Parent or Family
        • Donate to Our Equipment and Supplies Fund
        • Donate to the General Fund
    • Privacy Policy
    • California Consumer Privacy Act (CCPA)
    • Consumer Privacy HIPAA
  • About
    • Areas Served
    • Contact >
      • Referral Request
      • Satisfaction Survey
    • Brochures
    • Folletos en espanol
    • Who We Are >
      • What is a Trainee, Associate
    • What We Do
    • Meet Our Team >
      • Bryony Hottendorf - Human Resources Assistant
      • Roxanna Taylor- Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Roxanna Taylor- General Assistant Therapy Program
      • Leslie Martinez Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Kasandra Estrada
      • Erica Washington, MSW, ACSW Associate Clinical Social Worker 95523
      • Tiffany Runge, AMFT 112914
      • Emily Medina, MS, LMFT 134196
      • Tyree Griffith MS APCC 7863
      • Lizvet Garcia Therapist Trainee
      • Julianna Hopkins Therapist Trainee
      • Lizbeth Brito Therapist Trainee >
        • Lizbeth Brito aprendiz de terapeuta
      • Katie Servin Therapist Trainee >
        • Katie Servin ASL Therapist Trainee
      • Amber McGuire Therapist Trainee
      • Melinda Haynes, MA, LMFT. Executive Director
    • Our History
    • As Seen On
    • Trauma-Informed
    • Mission Vision Philosophy
    • Values
  • Services
    • Coaching >
      • Reunification Coaching
      • Co-Parenting | Parallel Parenting Coaching
      • Parent Skills Coaching
      • Kids Behavior Coaching
    • Therapy or Counseling >
      • Family Therapy
      • Child Therapy
      • Teen Therapy
      • Reunification Therapy
      • Co-Parenting Therapy
      • LGBTQAI+ Counseling
      • Christian Counseling
      • Foster /Kinship
      • Post-Adoption
      • Family Maintenance
      • EPIC Family
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Online Therapy >
        • Online Therapy- Questions and Answers
      • Cognitive-Behavioral (CBT)
      • Play Therapy
      • Play Therapy for Adults
      • Multi-Sensory Integration
      • Parent-Child Therpay
      • Experiential Therapy
      • REBT
      • EMDR
      • School Based Family Counseling >
        • For Schools and Districts- PBIS Partners
      • E-Motion >
        • Movement- Stored Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness
    • Supervised Visitation >
      • Online Visits
      • Getting Started
      • Facilitated Visitation
      • Monitored Exchange
    • Family Preservation
    • Groups >
      • Confident Kids
      • Productive Parenting
    • Daycare / School- Based Services
    • Associate Clinical Supervision
    • Workshops
    • Online Learning Center >
      • Become a Supervised Visitation Monitor
    • PBIS Partners >
      • Why Do We Have Empty Chairs?
      • Signs A Student May Benefit
      • Why Should My School Collaborate with FCCS?
      • School-Based Services May Include
  • Insurance / Fees
    • Insurance Accepted >
      • Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal
      • TriCare
      • Health Net
      • California Health and Wellness
      • Cigna
      • aetna
      • Molina
      • Molina Medi-Cal
      • Kaiser
      • Victim-Witness
      • Cash Pay
      • Important Note About Insurance
    • Superbills
    • Reduced Fee Therapy
  • Helpful Links
    • Legal Resources in California
    • Community Services >
      • Community Services- Butte County California
      • Community Services- Sacramento County California
      • Community Services- San Diego County California
      • Community Services- Orange County California
    • Can Therapy Help Me?
    • Can Therapy Help My Child?
    • Helping Kids Feel Safe in a Scary World
    • Attachment Trauma Recovery >
      • Origins of Attachment Trauma
      • Signs of Attachment Trauma in Adults and Children
      • Therapy for Attachment Trauma
    • Mental Health Apps
    • Help! My Kids Have Been Taken by CPS >
      • California CSD
    • Places to Go- Family Fun >
      • Places to Go in Texas
      • Places to Go in California >
        • Places to Go in Butte County California
        • Places to Go in Shasta County California
        • Places to Go Suisun City, California
        • Places to Go in Fairfield, California
      • Places to Go in North Carolina
      • Places to Go in Oklahoma >
        • Places to Go in Tulsa, Oklahoma
        • Places to Go in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
    • Recommended Reading
    • Celebrity Psychology
    • Weight Management >
      • Why We Develop Bad Habits
      • Diets Don't Work
      • Mapping Out Success
      • Journaling
      • Making New Habits
      • Creating Staying Power
    • Can We Talk?
    • Life On Their Terms >
      • Is My Partner Abusive?
      • The Cycle of Violence
      • Dangers of Staying
      • Healing From an Abusive Relationship
    • What is a Treatment Plan?
    • Of Caterpillars and Courage
    • LifeStyle Wellbeing- Creating a New You
  • Career Center
    • What We Offer
    • Practicum Site - Healthcare Administrator
    • Practicum Site - Therapist Trainee
    • Now Hiring Therapist Associate >
      • Therapist Associate Application
    • Now Hiring Community Based Therapist
    • Now Hiring Family Support Specialist
    • Now Hiring Assistant Program Manager Supervised Visitation