FAMILY & CHILDREN'S COUNSELING SERVICES, INC.
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Back to Guide

Examining Excuses
​

What excuses have you used to explain why you are still overweight, inactive, out of shape or otherwise unhealthy?  What excuses will you use when you fail to follow through and become the New You?  Let’s look at some of the more common excuses and examine their validity.  (For the full effect, read the list out loud in your best whiny voice.)

- I’m too busy.
- I’m too stressed out.
- Now is not a good time.
- I have too much weight to lose; I’ll never be able to do it.
- I didn’t/don’t understand what to do.
- My husband/kids/friends/parents aren’t supportive.
- I just can’t get motivated.
- I’m embarrassed by how I look.
- It’s in my genes to be fat.
- It’s too difficult.  

Excuses, excuses! Sound familiar?  Now, let’s see how these “reasons,” hold up under close inspection:

- I’m too busy- The truth is, just about everyone is “too busy.”  We all have responsibilities, errands, families, demands, deadlines, etc.  We all set our priorities.  If I decide that I am a priority too, I will rearrange my schedule, cut back on time-wasters and combine tasks to find the hidden time in every day.  Plus, people who work out typically report having increased energy which leads to getting things done more efficiently. 

- I’m too stressed.- Exercise reduces stress and gives you the ability to handle future stress better.

- Now is not a good time.- Let’s just be honest with each other, it will NEVER be a “good time.”  That’s why now is as good as it gets.  If you wait until you think it’s a “good time,” you will be waiting forever.  Not to mention the fact that the longer you wait, the harder it will be to get started.  So, why not resolve yourself to the fact that right now really IS a good time, after all?

- I have too much weight to lose; I’ll never be able to do it.- The years will come and go whether you are making progress toward reaching your health and fitness goals or not.  Procrastinating usually means worsened health.

- I didn’t/don’t understand what to do.- If you are having trouble understanding something on your own, get some help from a friend, support group, personal trainer or Therapist. Many tutorial blogs and videos are also available online.

- My husband/kids/friends/parents aren’t supportive.-  It’s human nature to fear the unknown and to resist change.  Sometimes those closest to us worry that our conversion to a healthier lifestyle will change our personality or relationship.  You can help to calm their fears by assuring them that you will be the same you, only better.  Then, decide to get healthy for yourself and them, anyway.

- I just can’t get motivated.- If the standard looking and feeling better, fitting into smaller clothes and ridding yourself of those weight-related health problems doesn't seem motivating, dig deeper to underlying reasons.

- I’m embarrassed by how I look.- Embarrassment is a real thing.  However, focusing on how other people (do you even know them?) are viewing us is a waste of time.  These others are probably not even thinking about- or even looking at you.  They are probably staring at their phones.  If going out in public is too much, you can start with a simple exercise routine in the privacy of your own home.

- It’s in my genes to be fat.- You may get your height or general body shape and build from your parents, but the amount of body fat you have is mostly up to you.  While some people may be genetically predisposed to a slower metabolism, most of the individuals who are members of overweight families are overweight due to environmental (not genetic) factors.  This means that a person with a sedentary lifestyle and poor eating habits will teach their children how to have a sedentary lifestyle and poor eating habits. 

- It’s too difficult.- Changing old habits can be difficult, but it’s not too difficult.  Plus, it is definitely rewarding: the greater the degree of difficulty, the greater your chance to shine!   

Examine your excuses and challenge them with facts and logic.  Be mindful so you will notice when you go into excuse mode.  

​And finally, replace your excuses of why you shouldn’t, can’t, won’t and don’t, with reasons of why you should, can, will and do!  


Back to LifeStyle Guide
​

This information should not serve as a replacement for therapy.  Please visit the Can Therapy Help Me page for more information if you think you may have an eating disorder, or should require individualized help.
​
​​

HELPING FAMILIES HEAL, PLAY AND LOVE!


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M-F: 9am - 6pm 
After hours and weekends by appointment 

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800-430-4490
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FCCS is directed by Melinda Haynes, MA, California LMFT 102308.  Oklahoma LMFT 1153. North Carolina LMFT 2143.

We provide therapy for various trauma issues including absent parent, parent in prison, violence, witnessing violence, domestic violence, tragedy, murder,, witness to murder, grief, loss,, death, friend killed, violence in neighborhood, fear, first responder, vicarious trauma, nightmares, panic.

​The National Supervised Visitation online training program is a subsidiary of FCCS and can be found at 
https://www.SupervisedVisitationTraining.com.  Professional consulting for mental and behavioral health professionals is available at www.MelindaHaynes.com.  



Providing Therapy Services in: Los Angeles | San Diego | San Francisco | San Jose | Fresno | Long Beach | Sacramento | Oakland | Santa Ana | Anaheim | Riverside | Stockton | Manteca | Chula Vista | Fremont | Irvine | San Bernadino | Modesto | Oxnard | Fontana | Moreno Valley | Glendale | Huntington Beach | Santa Clarita |  Garden Grove | Santa Rosa | Oceanside | Rancho Cucamonga | Ontario | Lancaster | Elk Grove | Palmdale | Corona | Salinas | Pomona | Torrance | Hayward | Escondido | Pasadena |  Orange | Fullerton | Thousand Oaks | Visalia | Simi Valley | Concord | Roseville | Santa Clara | Vallejo | Victorville | El Monte | Berkeley | Downey | Costa Mesa | Inglewood | Ventura | West Covina | Norwalk | Carlsbad | Fairfield | Richmond | Murrieta | Burbank | Antioch | Daly City | Temecula | Santa Maria | El Cajon | Rialto | Clovis | San Mateo | Compton | South Gate | Vista | Mission Viejo | Vacaville | Carson | Hesperia | Redding | Santa Monica | Westminster | Santa Barbara | Chico | Whittier | Newport Beach | San Leandro | Hawthorne | San Marcos | Citrus Heights | Alhambra | Tracy | Livermore | Buena Park | Lakewood | Merced | Hemet | Chino | Menifee | Napa

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    • Contact >
      • Referral Request
      • Satisfaction Survey
    • Brochures
    • Folletos en espanol
    • Who We Are >
      • What is a Trainee, Associate
    • What We Do
    • Meet Our Team >
      • Bryony Hottendorf - Human Resources Assistant
      • Roxanna Taylor- Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Roxanna Taylor- General Assistant Therapy Program
      • Leslie Martinez Supervised Visitation Monitor
      • Kasandra Estrada
      • Erica Washington, MSW, ACSW Associate Clinical Social Worker 95523
      • Tiffany Runge, AMFT 112914
      • Emily Medina, MS, LMFT 134196
      • Tyree Griffith MS APCC 7863
      • Lizvet Garcia Therapist Trainee
      • Julianna Hopkins Therapist Trainee
      • Lizbeth Brito Therapist Trainee >
        • Lizbeth Brito aprendiz de terapeuta
      • Katie Servin Therapist Trainee >
        • Katie Servin ASL Therapist Trainee
      • Amber McGuire Therapist Trainee
      • Melinda Haynes, MA, LMFT. Executive Director
    • Our History
    • As Seen On
    • Trauma-Informed
    • Mission Vision Philosophy
    • Values
  • Services
    • Coaching >
      • Reunification Coaching
      • Co-Parenting | Parallel Parenting Coaching
      • Parent Skills Coaching
      • Kids Behavior Coaching
    • Therapy or Counseling >
      • Family Therapy
      • Child Therapy
      • Teen Therapy
      • Reunification Therapy
      • Co-Parenting Therapy
      • LGBTQAI+ Counseling
      • Christian Counseling
      • Foster /Kinship
      • Post-Adoption
      • Family Maintenance
      • EPIC Family
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Online Therapy >
        • Online Therapy- Questions and Answers
      • Cognitive-Behavioral (CBT)
      • Play Therapy
      • Play Therapy for Adults
      • Multi-Sensory Integration
      • Parent-Child Therpay
      • Experiential Therapy
      • REBT
      • EMDR
      • School Based Family Counseling >
        • For Schools and Districts- PBIS Partners
      • E-Motion >
        • Movement- Stored Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness
    • Supervised Visitation >
      • Online Visits
      • Getting Started
      • Facilitated Visitation
      • Monitored Exchange
    • Family Preservation
    • Groups >
      • Confident Kids
      • Productive Parenting
    • Daycare / School- Based Services
    • Associate Clinical Supervision
    • Workshops
    • Online Learning Center >
      • Become a Supervised Visitation Monitor
    • PBIS Partners >
      • Why Do We Have Empty Chairs?
      • Signs A Student May Benefit
      • Why Should My School Collaborate with FCCS?
      • School-Based Services May Include
  • Insurance / Fees
    • Insurance Accepted >
      • Anthem Blue Cross Medi-Cal
      • TriCare
      • Health Net
      • California Health and Wellness
      • Cigna
      • aetna
      • Molina
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      • Kaiser
      • Victim-Witness
      • Cash Pay
      • Important Note About Insurance
    • Superbills
    • Reduced Fee Therapy
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      • Origins of Attachment Trauma
      • Signs of Attachment Trauma in Adults and Children
      • Therapy for Attachment Trauma
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    • Recommended Reading
    • Celebrity Psychology
    • Weight Management >
      • Why We Develop Bad Habits
      • Diets Don't Work
      • Mapping Out Success
      • Journaling
      • Making New Habits
      • Creating Staying Power
    • Can We Talk?
    • Life On Their Terms >
      • Is My Partner Abusive?
      • The Cycle of Violence
      • Dangers of Staying
      • Healing From an Abusive Relationship
    • What is a Treatment Plan?
    • Of Caterpillars and Courage
    • LifeStyle Wellbeing- Creating a New You
  • Career Center
    • What We Offer
    • Practicum Site - Healthcare Administrator
    • Practicum Site - Therapist Trainee
    • Now Hiring Therapist Associate >
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    • Now Hiring Community Based Therapist
    • Now Hiring Family Support Specialist
    • Now Hiring Assistant Program Manager Supervised Visitation